Friday, April 8, 2011

....Lust? There's an App for That

Ever since getting my IPhone 4 on February 10th, I've been amazed by how many apps there are, and all the weird and quirky functions these apps can do. Right now on my phone, I have an app to determine what type of "body shape" I have based on my fat/weight ratio, an app that tells me what song is playing if I'm at a restaurant and really want to know what catchy tune is coming through the speakers, an app that turns my voice into auto-tune like T-pain, and even a multi-track recorder when I have a new song idea. I could go on and on...there's no shortage of them!

In the same way, scripture never ceases to amaze me by it's scope: how many topics it touches on, and how specifically it addresses them. Sometimes we just have to search to find what we're looking for.

While studying Proverbs earlier this year, I stumbled over a scripture that caught my eye. As a collegiate pastor, one of the most common areas of sin I find myself addressing to my students is lust - seeking physical satisfaction or gratification from another person that is not their husband or wife. Often times, it is lust that occurs in the secrecy of one's own dorm room, apartment bedroom, or even in the corner of a room with their laptop facing them so no one can see. To be more specific, I've found that lust can creep in over Facebook in the aimless viewing of someone's pictures (or if they're not your friend, their profile pictures). Simply put, for the college student especially, lust is a dangerous weapon against our love for God, our sanctification, our relationship with our church, our priorities, our time management, our relationship with God's word, our prayer life, etc, etc (I think you get the point).

Here's what I found in Proverbs 4:14-19:

"Do not enter the path of the wicked, and do not walk in the way of the evil. Avoid it; do not go on it; turn away from it and pass on. For they cannot sleep unless they have done wrong; they are robbed of sleep unless they have made someone stumble. For they eat the bread of wickedness and drink the wine of violence. But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, which shines brighter and brighter until full day. The way of the wicked is like deep darkness; they do not know over what they stumble."

I know that for a lot of guys (probably girls as well), the process right before bed goes something like this:

1) Log on Facebook, "I wonder what's on my news feed?"
2) Look at girl's pictures.
3) Minutes goes by....
4) Hours go by...
5) Hopefully at this point it hasn't led to other things.
6) Lay in bed. Can't sleep.
7) There's only one way to fall asleep now...

That week at Bible Study when the issue of lust is addressed...

"I find myself having a really hard time falling asleep without..."

And the cycle continues.

Examining Proverbs 4 can convict us and give us hope that this cycle will not continue for the rest of our lives:

Starting with verse 14: "Do not enter the path of the wicked, and do not walk in the way of the evil. Avoid it; do not go on it; turn away from it and pass on."

Remove the girls/guys from your friends list that you don't actually know (or maybe you do know!), but their pictures cause you to stumble and lust after them. That way they don't show up on your news feed. Don't simply "remove them from your news feed". Remember, if you don't manage lust, lust will manage you. Then, make the commitment to not to log into Facebook at night, or within a certain amount of time before bed. (Or when you are alone!) Find someone of the same sex who will help you out - they could text you at night to ask how you're doing or call you in the evening to pray with you before bed. There are other creative ways - talk to this person about it!

Continuing with verses 16-17: "For they cannot sleep unless they have done wrong; they are robbed of sleep unless they have made someone stumble. For they eat the bread of wickedness and drink the wine of violence."

Does this describe you? 


Lastly, verses 18-19: "But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, which shines brighter and brighter until full day. The way of the wicked is like deep darkness; they do not know over what they stumble."

As Christians who have been made righteous through faith in Christ, our late-night activities should be just that: like the light of dawn. Above reproach. Pleasing to God. Honoring to our future husband or wife (or current!). Exemplifying our savior. Pure. Peaceful. Restful. Joyful. "It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest,eating the bread of anxious toil;for he gives to his beloved sleep." (Psalm 127:2). Unlike the world, whose way is like "deep darkness", our path at night should only get "brighter and brighter" until the next day. The students within my Church should have confidence that my integrity and my actions into the night are only getting more Christ-like minute-by-minute, hour-by-hour; not less!


If I could count how many times I've met guys who ask me, "why is my relationship with God so lackluster"? I  would need dozens of hands and feet. The common denominator? Late-night lust that takes their intimacy away from God. Yet they never think to make war against this late-night thief... "they do not know over what they stumble". It's hard to give stuff to God you've already given to yourself or a girl on a laptop screen.


The root of all sexual sin is this: "Not your pleasure God, but mine." At night, it could even be described like this: "Not your pleasure God, but my rest." In my own life, I've been led to believe a variety of lies to justify late-night lust. "I need energy tomorrow to serve the Lord - so whatever it takes to get me to sleep." Or, "By following through with this, I will now be able to have compassion on those who struggle..." Or, simply, "I will never conquer this battle...so I will just learn to live with it and maintain it." Then I got married - where God has been killing every last desire in me to please myself apart from my wife. You cannot simply maintain sexual sin in marriage, where the word commands: "because of immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband.The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Stop depriving one another." (1 Corinthians 7:2-5). Not to say marriage is the key to killing the lust within your heart. Because it's not. I also couldn't count on a dozen hands and feet how many guys have told me "marriage didn't help at all"...if not more guys saying "marriage made things worse"! Marriage is not the key to killing lust.


I can tell you what is. I'll let Billy Graham's grandson, Tullian Tchividjian take this one - it's from his article, "Reminders are More Effective than Rebukes" (I pulled it off the gospel coalition website). 


"Ironically, when we (or our “friends”) focus mostly on our need to get better we actually get worse. We become neurotic and self-absorbed. Preoccupation with my guilt over God’s grace makes me increasingly self-centered and morbidly introspective... But–and this is the point–our holiness is NOT what Christianity is all about! If it were, I and every other sinner out there would be in big, hopeless trouble. Christianity is not first about our getting better, our obedience, our behavior, and our daily victory over remaining sin–as important as all these are. It’s first about Jesus! It’s about his person and subsitutionary work–his incarnation, life, death, resurrection, ascension, session, and promised return. We are justified–and sanctified–by grace alone through faith alone in the finished work of Christ alone. So that even now, the banner under which Christians live reads, “It is finished.” The accountability I need, therefore, is the kind that corrects my natural  tendency to focus on me–my obedience (or lack thereof), my performance (good or bad), my holiness–instead of on Christ and his obedience, performance, and holiness for me. We all possess a natural proclivity to turn God’s good news announcement that we’ve been set free into a narcissistic program of self-improvement. We need to be held accountable for that (grin)!...Christian growth, in other words, does not happen first by behaving better, but believing better–believing in bigger, deeper, brighter ways what Christ has already secured for sinners. I need my family and friends to remind me of this all the time."


Amen.


In conclusion: God's word (unlike an IPhone 4) knows how to identify us, our struggles, and our pain. It also knows how to identify God's faithfulness to us in Christ through the midst of that pain.


Continuing from the previous article... "Realizing the Colossian Christians were being tempted to buy counterfeit versions of salvation (self-improvement and freedom through rule-keeping being the main ones), Paul repeatedly reminds them of the treasure they already have in Christ. His point: don’t buy false versions of what you already have. In 1:9-14, Paul sums things up by saying, essentially, “You will grow in your understanding of God’s will, be filled with spiritual wisdom and understanding, increase in your knowledge of God, be strengthened with God’s power which will produce joy filled patience and endurance (v.9-12a) as you come to a greater realization that you’ve already been qualified, delivered, transferred, redeemed, and forgiven (v.12b-14)."

And like we all know so well - the Word tells us to do these things, because we wouldn't naturally do them on our own. We need God to remind us that only through an elevated love for grace can we kill late-night lust. Simply trying to target and annihilate the lust on our own strength will only cause us to feel like failures (and lead us to believe we're unworthy in the eyes of God...and thus doubt the gospel.)

Praying for all my brothers and sisters who are desperately seeking purity in Christ!

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